What I Do
For couples who are thinking about breaking up but haven’t yet made the decision and want to talk it through with therapist, or who want to give it one last go.
Couples, like individuals, go through growth stages. Moving in together, marriage, kids, ’empty nest’, ageing etc., are moments when relationships change, new roles emerges, and some things need to be let go of.
Conflicts, lost trust, infidelity, control and power issues, sexual difficulties, suspicion, accusations, jealousy, anger, grief, lost meaning, boundaries, parents, children, co-dependency.
Couple’s sessions can be used as a space for growth. You can work together to learn about your relationship; it’s purpose, needs and anticipated challenges and opportunities.
Relationship issues exists across multiple levels: individual, communication, role (e.g. wife, husband, father, mother, child, lover etc.), atmosphere and feelings, social environment and it’s impact. These different levels need to be addressed during therapy.
To discuss your concerns and views and find our more about how I work.
when to work together
Couples therapy is recommended when both partners want to work together; agreeing to work and being engaged in the work are basic requirements to start therapy. This agreement can be discussed during the first session.
Couples can also work together when both people sense they have an issue that needs to be discussed together and they both feel that doing it individually won’t resolve it.
Working together on the relationship is also recommended when couples want to be more aware of their relationship, to learn and growth together or when they anticipate a problem in the future and want to prepare for it together.
Couples sessions are also helpful when people are considering breaking up and want help to decide, or who want help to break up well.
how long does it take
Couples therapy can vary from a one-off consultation to several months of regular sessions depending on the goals of the couple and if they are focusing on growth and learning, or if they’re in crisis and therapy is their last resort. Some couples also just come in every few months to keep their relationship healthy.
The first session is a good time to clarify both the time frame, and what issues will be worked with. Sometimes individual therapy or other kinds of individual work are sometimes recommended, alongside the couple’s therapy.
how it helps
Inviting a new person to actively witness your relationship in intimate and often difficult moments is not easy but is sometimes a powerful factor for change itself. It can support listening and understanding of each other, and addressing the issue in a new way with agreement about how you will process it and what outcome is expected and possible.
how do i work
My approach is process oriented psychology. In my work I look for feedback signals from the couple to follow and support the process of their relationship. Sometimes we talk, or play roles, or I work with one person through an individual issue while they’re witnessed by their partner, or go beyond words to notice body language, distance and space in the relationship.
booking a session
To book a therapy session use the form at the bottom of this page. If you prefer to make an appointment by phone, use the form below and include your phone number and I will call you back or you can just call or text me.